“Unfortunately, I’m an Optimist”

Ellen Koeniger, Lake George (1916) photo in high resolution by Alfred Stieglitz

Friend-

When determining whether you see the glass as half empty or half full, I encourage you to use anything but a glass- the answer leans half-empty, and you know it. Being an optimist, I refuse to accept this method as scientific and seek more learn-ed ways. As a woman of science (two-quarters pre-med), I know any experiment must follow strict data collection and analysis procedures. Therefore, I will NOT conclude after listening to Sufjan Stevens’s “Fourth of July” or Peter Bjorn and John’s “Young Folks”- such extremes would only lead to inaccuracy.

Instead, I keep a running tally in the curriculum vitae of my life. Earlier today, I heard that 80% of the US population has cancer-causing glyphosate in their urine- a point for pessimism. Later, I saw two women walking down the street armed with fists and scissors, playing rochambeau, and wondered where they were going and if they had a conversation like:

“Where do you want to eat? I want Chinese.”

“Well, I feel like Mexican.”

“Let’s shake for it.”

How good it was to see two people resolve conflict through the most time-honored diplomatic means- a point for optimism. I thought, ‘maybe we’ll make it, glyphosate and all.’ When I looked down at my tallies, somehow, the two canceled each other out. Sure, one carries far more weight than the other, but your data gets slightly skewed when you lean optimistic.

Experiencing, observing- this is a lifelong experiment filled with bitter and blissful moments. In the end, the results will be inconclusive, as so many experiments are. It was good; it was bad; it canceled out. Maybe it just was.

But- if I’m presented with a half-filled glass and the ancient hum of the universe asks, “half empty or half full?”

I’m saying full.